So, now I will try to get used to this loneliness. We do love each other, but her depression, mixed with her anxiety about our future as parents of the same child, is becoming too much for me to remain hopeful. Even if tears are streaming down your face, it doesnt mean that the conversation must stop. Like I, I flew back to UK with only 90 in my pocket, I mean I had nothing in the bank, not a penny, no home in UK and no work. She has 6 years of experience writing in various fields, such as finance, education, and lifestyle. But, I love her and I want to support her I dont want to turn my back on her. It sounds like you have been a tremendous source of love, strength, and support for your girlfriend in her battle with depression. Please know there is hope, and help is available. Web1. i hurt my girlfriend so many times and now i just wanna make it up to her and show her i love her so much how should i do it ? I was so excited about falling in love, but now I feel like a fool. My girlfriend has been depressed for a number of years, unable to shake feelings of sadness and hopelessness that carry over into almost every aspect of our life together. Many men learn not to cry as part of the psychological patriarchy and socialization they go through as boys. Produced by Rob Szypko , So, the saying that once a cheater, always a cheater isn't an absolute truth. Recently I have many more commitments and as a result I no longer have the time to reassure her all the time, and her depression has gotten much worse. This is not an excuse but an actual fact. I even offered to pay for the consultation costs. Also, Im placed as the general emotional support to everyone around me. Its hell and theres a lot of doubt in your thoughts like is it my fault, Im I the same, can I not make someone happy, am i insensitive. If your relationship also has signs of being emotionally abusive, it might be time to think about it. Everything seems so dark without you. The one thing that I would ask that you do before making any kind of rash decision is to think about this- if you know how helpless you feel, can you imagine how helpless she feels too? Get yourself some therapy to deal with the hurt and pain, then move on with your life. I never imagined there would come such a time when we wouldnt talk to each other. Im more bummed cause were not having as much sex as Id like. My girlfriend (F24) and I (M26) have been dating for about 3 months. I used to be able to help her cheer up and have a good time with her whenever she was sad but now,I cant do anything without getting an attitude from her or saying something stupid. Shell probably choose you at first but then once she goes back to try and be friends with the ex, end that shit. If she needs the ex in her life she doesnt need you, she just wants you. How does one remedy the wounds from such an emotionally draining fight in a relationship that is otherwise very stable?Or is this a point of no return? I believe in us and that our love will help us overcome every difficult phase. I Feel Helpless! If I talk in a neutral tone or raise my voice even slightly she says I am scary and becomes inconsolable. If she doesn't respond right away, be patient. Let her try and fix that. A trusted therapist will help you thoroughly explore these questions, develop insights, and create and implement a plan of action. lack of motivation. To make it up to you, I wish to spend some time with you at any vacation place of your choice. Talk about it and reflect on which kind of crier you are. And he just feels like a failure and a burden onto everyone else to the point he has almost committed suicide twice. Maybe someday down the road, well meet again, but until then, lets just say goodbye without any regrets or hard feelings between us two lovers once upon a time. I am afraid that if I leave she will kill herself, she is completely obsessed with me and I cant escape. I am sorry for everything I did that day. With every challenging comment, they begin to cry. In our life memories play very confusing role. how do I get her back? Crying usually enlists empathy and closeness with your partner, as vulnerability brings people together. Theres a lot of pain in watching someone else you love give up on their own life, be unhappy about decisions they made and wonder why the relationship is falling apart when theyve manipulated your emotions by hurting u, breaking up with you so many times and not having anything positive to say on any problem you or they have,together or singularly. When two people gaze into each others eyes for a few minutes, they can develop deeper trust and greater intimacy and mutual attraction. Lately, Ive been becoming stronger, Ive finished my graduation, am starting to work by myself. She says she feels okay when she clearly doesnt, when I give her a hug during this time, she tenses up, keeps shaking her head, and really hates herself for the way she is. Instead, send one of these break-up texts and tell her that shell always have a special place in your heart, but theres no room for her in yours anymore. I wish things could have been different, but they werent meant to be. Tell her how much she means to you. But now I will stop doing all these and will only work on myself. Im really hurt, I know Im losing her, I am starting to become, once again, insecure, isolated, anxious. Just give me one chance to work on our relationship. An apology can effectively repair your relationship with your girlfriend and win her trust back. Every heart has a pain. Over. I strongly encourage you to begin your own therapy. Dear Dragged Down, It sounds like you have been a tremendous source of love, strength, and support for your girlfriend in her battle with depression. But I cant do that, so I will try my best to make it up to you in a conciliatory manner. I love her so much but I hurt her. The 3 Cs: You didnt Cause it, you cant Control it, you cant Cure it. I dont want you to think that this was your fault because it wasnt. Dear Armand, Give me another chance, and I wont disappoint you this time. I tried so hard not to keep thinking about you, but my heart doesnt work that way. Ive never been so stressed and sad and angry my whole life. Dear M, If you would like to find a mental health professional for your girlfriend, you can start finding therapists in your area by entering your city or ZIP code into the search field on this page: https://www.goodtherapy.org/find-therapist.html. That sounds like my issue too. Like you rejecting the last possible form of understanding and connection. You know, what is the most painful thing? I just cant take the angry outbursts then the crying then the woe is me attitude over every tiny event. Especially, your significant other! WebI hurt my girlfriend and made her cry over a dumb argument. You can truely love someone that you hurt the most. I still love him so much, but I think its the best choice for both of us. I have been through alot in the last 10 years, daughter born with brain defect. Most of you experienced it yourselves unless you are blessed with incredible good looks or a family wealth. WebNews Flash. When someone rejects your unconditional love, it hurts. Own up to your mistake without offering excuses or justifications. If I go out without my phone I will find I have around 20-30 messages when I get back all telling me how selfish I am for ignoring her. Im so hurt lately, and she doesnt give it a mind, and she doesnt barely talk to me on the late days. I have had bad experiences in the past with SO's leaving in the middle of the night in vague and hurtful ways. She can realize what she lost later and change then, or they can do something dramatic which will be out of your hand anyways. Copyright 2007 - 2023 GoodTherapy, LLC. If you have solution, you are God for me:(. I love you. 11. I promise to never behave in the same way again. they always flirt with her and makes her emotional. SO IF YOU HANG AROUND PEOPLE LIKE THIS YOU WILL TAKE ON THEIR THINKING AND HABITS MAKE NO MISTAKE ABOUT IT. I would answer, I just want to feel free and safe. Archived post. Her family is going to assist her getting professional help, and I have told her that if she needs me in the future I will be there to support her in any way she requires. fatigue or emotional exhaustion. I dont know what to do, I want to go out and do stuff, cant be potato couch forever. She struggles to make friends and has isolated herself from the world. Home Terms of Service Privacy Policy Sitemap Subscribe to The GoodTherapy Blog. Web1. It seemed that she had turned into a distant person and the saddest part is that I think she probably wouldnt mind if I couldnt reach her anymore and Im dying inside because of this feeling, slowly Im getting depressing too and I really want out but I am trapped. There are two main types of intimacy: friendship-based and passion-based (i.e. You are pushing me away cause you cant feel my pain. But I really need her back in my life. I want you to be proud of me. When we first met, I knew we were perfect for each other. WebJust 5 weeks ago I hurt her in the same way, I told her some ugly things because I was mad at her for no reason, I was insecure and in love and I thought: maybe she is not in love with me as I am with her. Love provides you with wings to fly but also with chains to hold back your dreams. She likes me to stay home with here all the time. 9. I missed her, but she pushed me away and i got fed up from this. Would you still be ignoring my agony if you knew how many sleepless nights I spent missing you? I thought I would come to your house and talk to you, but I was afraid you might shut the door on my face after what happened, so Ive decided to write you a letter. July 3, 2023. I respect you so much, and I would never deliberately try to hurt you. So yes, As if 'matching her energy' was an excuse. No one wants to be sad and get pain. Let them know what you are going through. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. it takes a lot of courag and resolve to stick around and be supportive to your partner and youve done that.kudos to that.please see that you have been strong and supportive for so long so you cannot think you will break.be confident and seek better outlets.therapy can help in a major way as I have seen.all the best. Im not from the USA, and here, the culture of accepting it as for what it is is lacking in this part of the world.My bf of almost 8 years rolls his eyes, when the other me is present. she seems happy and loves her flowers i bring and the breakfast in bed. You have to tell her when she hurts you. I am extremely sorry for what I did and think hard about it. Nothing you can do to help. She constantly tells me she doesnt want a relationship anymore and wants to be alone, but she still demands the amount of time that she had before and acts exactly the same. I have been with my girlfriend long distance for over a year now. He never told me his true feelings for me until he asked me to be his proper girlfriend (of corse I said yes) the first 3 months was perfect, He treat me like a princess even though he was depressed he was lovely, under one condition, if I didnt go see my friends and I didnt drink alcohol. You came into my life because you wanted to, you are also leaving me because you want to. We started dating a few months after the divorce and (I admit we could have been more responsible of our actions) she is now pregnant with our first child. Its over now. I lost my faith in myself, in my abilities, in my attractiveness, I also lost my job because I was physically sick because of stress. He is also seeing a psychiatrist who has advised he doesnt work I am doing 3 jobs to pay for my divorce as he is going to go bankrupt with his business =- because he couldnt face going in to work except at lunch time. My silence doesnt mean that I quit, It simply means that I dont want to argue with people who just dont want to understand. And if she is gone, and doesnt want to rekindle what you had. Please continue to love me the way you always do. 3. If you have trouble finding a professional in your area, dont be discouragedit may mean youll have better luck doing a Google search or asking for a referral from a trusted health professional, such as your doctor. she is unhappy with dating. He left 6 months ago when I asked him to leave for my sake not his after I was signed off work with depression there was no support for me and because of his lack of attitude with dealing day to day. I dont think this is going to work out. My girlfriend of 6 months began declining about a month ago. Send a package with love letters or get some flowers delivered to her house. sad Want to hurt myself : selfharm - Reddit My counselling has help enormously, writting a jounral also helps. If you have solution, you are God for me:(, I am crying here because I feel you guys are talking about problem that I am facing. It very much matters how we view our thoughts as well. Once back in UK-I always wanted to be back with my wife. Please Forgive Me. (This Relationship Is Her friends told me that she really cried a lot when i left her. Hey, lately iv been feeling more and more distant from my gf. sad message 7,889 41,488 crying sad msg 2,609 8,603 sad messages 2,390 9,412 sad message for her 2,286 8,435 sad messages to make her cry 1,862 5,596 emotional message 1,709 6,543 sad love message 1,543 6,071 painful message to your girlfriend 1,350 4,149 painful love text messages 1,160 3,960 sad massage 1,137 2,990 sad mood message 1,108 2,786 sad love messages 1,070 2,987 emotional messages 931 1,960 hurt message for her 888 2,074 sad sms 785 1,915 sad emotional messages 759 1,439 sad message for him 756 1,999 sad message for girlfriend 631 1,889 sad message for boyfriend 615 2,115 painful messages for him 566 1,322 hurt message 499 1,035 painful love text messages for her 475 1,258 hurt messages 465 1,663 sad text messages 446 852 sad text message, 70 Pregnancy Announcement Messages and Wording, Sympathy Thank You Messages, Notes and Wording, Graduation Wishes for Girlfriend - Congratulations Messages. Stop seeing him and get to a gym and get a grand makeover. Sometime our emotions for so many people we love and being pulled from so many directions causes us to partly shut out the ones we love most, we take for granted that they love us and understand,but its not always the case,it takes disaster to focus on what's going wrong but by then its gone. Wow.. so many people with so many similar issues and I thought I was the only one! I know you do it out of love and concern. Warning: I am extremely emotional today! We can all get through this. A woman goes through a break up, she goes out, cries half the time and gets her drinks paid for all night and has her choice of a half a dozen guys fighting over her. WebI've been with my girlfriend for a little over 2 years and I've probably made her cry at least half a dozen times unintentionally. Be sincere in your words and actions, and do not write anything that you do not mean just because you want to win her over again. She has a comfortable home life but is in a constant state of conflict with her parents because of how she is treated.. Namely them trying to get her out on her own after graduating and trying to find a job. Click here for additional information. Weve tried, and weve tried, but its just not working out anymore. Girlfriend broke my heart 3 days agoIve never hurt this bad. 20+ Sad Break Up Texts to Make Her Cry - Elizegan I deserve happiness, everyone does! Things are never as simple as you think. thanks for everyone comments! I really wish GoodTherapy.org would have some people, professionals or people who had past experiences in line with all the above comments and have them offer some advice and hope for everyone here. Smoking and drinking! now I feel elated happy not grumpy and now a positive thinker,when I tried to speak to her she does not believe me when I tell her I can give all my compassion to her and her children and live the rest of my life with her. Real, T. (1996). You are helpful to them by being there when they need you. Ive tried to think of ways to break it off that wont make her hate herself, like saying Im gay or having friends pose as drug dealers and freak her out by having them threaten me when shes around. Then to know she will react & get angry is so wrong. I hurt my girlfriend so many times and now i just wanna make Like i texted her after an hour or two and she read some of them. The Art of Relational Crying | Psychology Today Trust me, baby, Im trying hard to be the one to protect you and working toward being the best version of myself. Still, its all your decision. But one should cherish the fact that someone wants to share their life with you. WebIs it weird that I cried over accidentally making my girlfriend feel bad? I know thats going to be the final solution to all this, but is there anything anyone else could recommend? I dont know what to do any more, Im losing to much sleep, my work is taking a toll and so is my health. And you have every right to hate me. I feel as much like a caretaker as I do a boyfriend. Its bad and I feel so trapped. But right now I wish you were here. I still dont know what to do and I feel terrible. But the worst pain comes when you dont know whether to wait or forget! From then onwards,my girl friend got suffering from depression slowly.but I was not knowing that and she also didnt share anything to me. She lives 200 km away from me and Its extremely helpful to be able to read something from the person suffering from depression. There are several essential points one needs to keep in mind and be aware of while writing an apology letter to ensure that the message is passed on sincerely and correctly. Tomorrow my lady and I would be ten months not quite a year, but things have switched off lately. All rights reserved. Shes gone to therapy, but currently not going. Im not sure what to say. Hurt On our first Valentines day together, we had both promised to love and cherish each other. I love my girlfriend and nothing else, no human can change it. I dont know what to do anymore. RELATED POST23 Best Positive Break up Messages to Send to Him or HerHow to Make a Couple Break Up (10 Easy Ways)Best Polite Breakup Messages You Can Use (15 Top Picks)Ways to Move On Easily After a Break Up (9 Great Tips)30+ Break up quotes to help you move on easily, If you are receiving mixed signals from a married woman, especially over at text, you can wonder what true signs she wants you to make a move. Whether it's romance, friendship, family, co-workers, or basic human interaction: we're here to help! Step by step. Me and my LDR girlfriend were originally together for 7 months, then took a break for 3, and now we are back together. Very often, when one takes on the role of caretaker, it becomes such a consuming task that the caretaker loses touch with himself/herself. But youre so young and its not very obvious but so many people go through this at some point in their lives because life truly is pretty messed up. July 3, 2023. I know I make mistakes, and sometimes, the same mistakes repeatedly. Everyday is a battle. Just know that I am waiting right here with my arms open to hug you and never let you go again. You are always there; you are everywhere. Then we got into this back and forth about her not wanting to have a sleepover and me expressing my feelings about it which she said made her feel like the villain. How Many Times Can My Heart Take A Breakup? I feel im depressed, asking myself was actually our sexlife good becuase she was drinking, and that the person im with now has no interest in sex at all? I still see him he wrote 2 suicide notes to me and his dad ( when I asked him to leave) and produced them for me to read. Tell the other person the things that attracted you in the first place, and what you like about him or her.